sustained....

I’m sitting here in the staff girls’ apt on this lovely Sunday afternoon, thinking, and reading, and writing. Also listening to “Storm All Around You” by Jon Thurlow. [find it on youtube! now.]

Also wishing I had a cup of coffee nearby. It would complete the picture.

Bethany, Kayla, and Emily are all close by. We’re sitting around, doing nothing...and enjoying it immensely. Not one is talking or moving much. Unnecessary. The silence is almost religious feeling, but comfortable too. You know what kind of silence I’m talking about? It’s wonderful and bereft of the need for conversation.

Verity has been a whirlwind the past 2 weeks. Crazy. I’ve had a fair amount of “down” time, but my emotions and brain have been running on high, so it feels like I haven’t stopped at all. Still. I love this job. Wouldn’t trade it for anything right now. It’s more than the cooking, menu planning, brain work, number work, or food ordering. I just know this is where I’m supposed to be. I know God has me here for a reason. Since I stepped back on campus almost 9 months ago, I’ve felt like there was a purpose for all of this. It’s a divine appointment. Maybe I’ll never find out why....

The people make it worth it. Every second is worth it. The [multitude of] answered prayer, the smiles, the hugs, the laughter, the tears, the frustration, the candid conversations, the disappointments, the tired days, the days when I can’t stop smiling... it’s all worth it. And I’ve had a bunch of those days. The days when I feel like I’m literally [yes, literally] glowing. I couldn’t put my finger on why I felt like that, but I’m beginning to understand.

When I came back after summer break, I was scared to death. Last semester, I’d had an abundance of help and support in the kitchen. Sure, not everything was a piece of cake, but I knew there would always be a “family” to help pick up slack and support and love unconditionally. [side note: I miss the rest of the kitchen fam like crazy. Not a day goes by when I don't think about, pray for, or miss y'all...] I knew this semester would be different.

scared. to. death.

I prayed and prayed and prayed. I didn’t know what was going to happen, didn’t know if I would have enough help. People. God answers prayer. He provides. I’ve felt His constant protection. I am not in this alone. I’ve had plenty of help, and on the days when I feel like I don’t, it all miraculously gets done. That’s HIM. That’s my Jesus.

Yesterday is just one of the examples when I’ve felt His presence and protection. Beth and I were in the kitchen making pizza for 150. We were down to an hour to get it done and I wasn’t sure it would happen.

dear Jesus, please send someone to help....

BOOM!

Three [amazingly incredible] guys walk in and tell us that they’re there to help us. Say whaaat? They put their stuff down, rolled up their sleeves, and jumped right in to pizza prep. I’m still kinda reeling from that. I’m not only blown away by the fact that those guys spent their free time on a Saturday to help us out, but also because Jesus is just so kind and gracious and loving. 

He has not and will not abandon me!

Thank you, Lord. 

I just love Him a lot. :)