snapshot

Location: Beautiful Elberta, Alabama

Place: Summer camp

Job: Kitchen staff

Current emotional status: ….

This post is a snapshot of my life, my brain...

I find myself in a completely different world. The accents are strange to my Midwest ears. The weather is slightly hot and sticky, though not horrible at all. The work is familiar but foreign at the same time. Even the bugs are unusual. Only Jesus remains the same….constant and true.

At this very second in time, I am thinking about the people I have left... but not left behind. I carry them around in my head. They are like beautiful snapshots. Throughout the day, I remember them, take them out, and stare at them, trying to memorize every detail, every look, every conversation. It is all so precious to me. I am so thankful for every single second. No exaggeration there.

It doesn’t take much at all to trigger a reminder of people. It’s almost constant. A phrase here, a song there, a recipe, an ingredient. It’s crazy. So often throughout the day, I feel like I might cry because I miss people so much. And it hasn’t even been a full week yet!! Jesus was so gracious to place each of you in my life. and I am so grateful that you have been planted in my heart.

The days here are long and full. I start work at 6 each morning, and my first break doesn’t come till noon. The afternoons are usually another 4 hours of work. In my free time, the pier is inviting, the books are plentiful, the writing is waiting… so much to do. But I feel like this opportunity here is more than just the job or how I spend my free time. I’m still waiting to see how Jesus works everything together…

Hope is such a fragile thing. One wrong move and it can tear to shreds and disappear. The past few weeks have been very very hard. Some of my deepest hurts and disappointments have happened. Each day is a challenge. Will I look to Him, and let Him take this burden, or will I let it overwhelm me and bring me down? My hope should not be dependent on circumstances. It should be anchored in Christ and His unfailing love and protection. Despite everything that hurts, or distracts my spirit, if I stop to think about it, I know deep down that Jesus does love me, and that He never leaves my side. When will the reality of His presence constantly pervade my soul?

The song that I have playing at the moment is one I am adopting as this “new season’s” theme song. I Will Waste My Life by Misty Edwards.  Here’s part of it.

I will waste my life.

And I’ll be tested and tried.

No regrets inside of me,

Just to find I’m at Your feet.

Just let me find I’m at Your feet…

I’ll leave my father’s house

And I’ll leave my mother.

I’ll leave all I have known

And I’ll have no other.

Oh how I love You and there is no cost.

Oh how I love You and there is no loss.

Oh how I love You, I wanna take Your name.

Oh how I love You, I wanna cling to You, Jesus.

Just let me cling to You, Jesus.